6 Sex Tips for Men
From foreplay to the safe use of sex toys, there are many things that an adventurous man known for great sex might feel they have to be an expert in. We get that keeping up with trends in sexual pleasure can feel a little overwhelming, but the good news is that it’s not as complicated as most “sexperts” make it seem.
Good sex is about communication, knowledge and health, and better sex is really just about taking those same things to the next level.
Looking to make the leap from memorable to mind-blowing? Below, we’ve collected some insightful sex advice to help you perform, connect and experience even better pleasure.
21 Best Sex Tips For Men
Whether we’re talking about you or your partner, sexual satisfaction is largely about the connection. After all, if the only thing you’re looking for is an orgasm, there’s solo fun, right?
Sex and your love life are about matching sexual energy and vulnerability, and doing things with another person that make you want to turn the family photos face down for the night.
Here are 21 tips that can take your game — and your partner — to outer space.
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Hit the Gym
We all like to be our most confident selves in the bedroom, but exercise may also help stave off erectile dysfunction (ED).
Engaging in physical activities like running, swimming and dancing has been shown to be effective in managing sexual difficulties, so make time for moving your body (outside of bed) regularly.
Kegels: They’re Not Just for Women!
While we’re on the topic of exercise, you might want to incorporate a particular one into your routine. The benefits of kegels for women are well-known, but men can also see improvements in stamina, sexual control and urinary function from kegel exercises.
Food is Fuel… for Great Sex
Healthy diets lead to better heart health, which can support harder, more reliable erections. To be your best sexual self, experts suggest consuming a diet rich in legumes, vegetables and fruits, and keeping red meat, dairy and things considered “junk food” to a minimum.
Knock Off the Sugar Consumption
If you’re looking for one particular food that you can avoid for better erections, the answer is sugar.
Eating too much sugar can lead to high blood glucose, which has been linked to damaged nerves and blood vessels — both of which can and do occur in your penis. Cut back on the sugar and you could prevent permanent problems down the road.
Make Some Noise!
Whether you’re trying to get kinky or just want your partner to speak up a bit, communication is key to good sex — and it might be something you need to work on too.
Shared vulnerability builds trust, connection and intimacy, and can help both of you warm up to experimentation. In short, building a strong foundation of communication in and out of bed is a great way to have better sex.
Make a Lateral Move
One of the things your partner may communicate about is trying new things, and luckily there are a seemingly endless number of sex positions to try out.
Exploring different angles of penetration can stimulate different erogenous zones and lead to better, more intense orgasms. Just remember to check in during penetrative sex and other forms of stimulation to make sure everyone’s enjoying it.
Blow Off the Stress
Stress can really ruin the magic and beat down your ego. It can also ruin a good night of intimacy if it finds its way into the bedroom.
Make sure you’re managing stress, reducing your exposure to it and setting boundaries. And if you need more help managing stress, online counseling might be worth a look.
Use Prescription Medication…Responsibly
Even if you follow the rest of our tips, sexual issues like erectile dysfunction can bring your sex life to an abrupt halt. Luckily there are ways to address it with medications like Viagra®, sildenafil (generic Viagra), Cialis®, Stendra® and Levitra®.
To learn more about erectile dysfunction and treatment methods, check out our guide to the most common erectile dysfunction treatments and drugs.
Keep an Eye on the Scale
We’re all about body acceptance, but there’s a very real point where carrying too much weight can affect your sex life regardless of how attractive your partner finds you.
Studies have found that people who are obese and lead inactive lives tend to have higher chances of developing sexual difficulties, so maintain a healthy weight — see above for tips on diet and exercise.
Cut Back on the Booze
And while you’re getting bad habits in check, we’ll also mention the well-established connection between chronic alcohol use and sexual dysfunction. If you drink regularly and are finding it harder and harder to reach orgasm, you may need to look at your nights out and pints downed.
Talk Dirty
Want to get the mood going earlier in the day, build up your partner’s excitement and treat your DMs like foreplay? Try some dirty talk.
A few suggestive messages about what you’ll be doing when you see them later can get the ball rolling hours before you get home, and it may lead to some exciting new opportunities.
If nothing else, it’s a way to gauge their enthusiasm levels for intimacy that night without having to be a body language expert.
But Keep Your Penis Clean
Men’s health is about a lot of things, but we’d say it’s very much about hygiene. Don’t forget basic cleaning downstairs.
Whether you’re circumcised or not, smegma can build up if you fail to keep your glans clean, so make sure to pay special attention to it in the shower. Your partner will thank you.
Give Your Partner’s Whole Body Attention (and Orgasms)
Let’s talk anatomy for a moment: the clitoris is a very different part of the body than the penis, with very different nerve endings. That’s just one of the many reasons that the female orgasm isn’t the same rodeo as the male orgasm.
You can read millions of words on clitoral stimulation, the G-spot orgasm and other anatomical “ultimate guide” content, but there is absolutely no substitution for asking your partner what they like.
Want to make it fun? Ask her to show you how she touches herself when you’re not around. It’s fun to make eye contact while you’re both masturbating, and it’s also a great time to file away some techniques for the next time it’s your turn.
Explore Other Erogenous Zones
While we’re talking about whole body sensations, it’s important to remember that your partner’s entire body can be a conduit for the electricity of intimacy. Give attention to their inner thighs, nipples, perineum, anus, neck and stomach.
And consider using toys — a vibrator can cause complementary sensations to what your tongue brings to the table, and if you’re the one holding it, you get the credit.
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Use Lube
Just because something feels great for you doesn’t mean your partner is enjoying it. Maybe you’re heading the wrong way down a one-way street, maybe you skipped crucial foreplay time — doesn’t matter how we got here. The point is to make being “here” comfortable, and a little lubrication goes a long way.
Talk About Your Feelings
Therapy is great for working on your mental health, and sex therapy is great for working on the part of your mental health that affects your sex life. Not happy with your hangups? Feeling a little self-conscious for some reason? Seeing a sex therapist is a great way to work on these things.
They help you work through complicated feelings about sexual desire, sexual orientation, intimacy fears or whatever is keeping you from living your best sex life.
Go to the Doctor
For those of you who avoid doctor visits until a limb is falling off: go to the doctor.
Routine medical checks can help you keep an eye on blood pressure and cholesterol, prevent transmissible diseases from going unnoticed until it’s too late and ask questions about anything that seems out of sorts.
Masturbate Semi-Regularly
The science on the benefits of masturbation is a little thin, but experts have suggested that regular self-pleasure can help with everything from increasing your stamina to potentially warding off prostate cancer. We’re not convinced, but we’re also having trouble finding consequences to just doing it anyway.
Masturbate Before Sex
One of the best times to masturbate (especially if your stamina could be better) is before sex. After orgasm, men enter something called the refractory period — a sort of cool-down window before we’re able to orgasm or ejaculate again. You can use the refractory period to your advantage to help you last longer on your second orgasm of the day, though you may have to try a few times to find the right timing.
Listen to Feedback
It can be really hard to take criticism of your sexual prowess well, but it can be even harder for someone who loves you to offer it in the first place. If a partner gives you feedback about sexual positions they prefer, sexual fantasies they want you to explore further or techniques that help them get off, listen and apply what they say.
Address PE, ED and Sexual Dysfunction Like a Boss
We already talked about using ED medication responsibly, and we’ll stress again that these are very safe and effective. Whether you have ED or premature ejaculation is affecting your sex life, getting treated is the only real solution you have at your disposal. Premature ejaculation treatments may take a little trial and error, but there are solutions out there for you. Don’t ignore any sexual dysfunction problems — make them go away with the help of a doctor.
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Boosting Sexual Performance
Everyone wants great sex, and whether it’s a blood flow-related condition, some self-confidence issues or just a lack of sexual communication, sometimes we have to work a little harder to achieve what we want. But if you’re willing to put in the work, you and your partner will see the results.
For a lot of people, sexual experiences can begin with some awkwardness and fumbling but you’ll get a better handle on things as you keep going.
Simple lifestyle changes to your diet and exercise routines can improve your overall and sexual health.
Communicating well with your partner can improve your comfort, help you connect and open the door to role-playing and other opportunities.
Sexual dysfunction doesn’t have to be permanent — treatment, medication and therapy can help with ED, PE and more.
This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. The information contained herein is not a substitute for and should never be relied upon for professional medical advice. Always talk to your doctor about the risks and benefits of any treatment or medication.